While on my way to speak at Capital City Grief Coalition about Transitions And Money Essentials (TAME) yesterday, I had to take a detour to get there. It was at 5 PM, and the torn up streets in rush hour were congested and extremely slow moving. When I first saw that "DETOUR" sign, I felt annoyed and worried that I might be late, even though I'd allowed extra time. Have you ever noticed how often it seems, that after that first detour sign pointing you away from where you want to go, the additional direction signs become scarce? You're not even sure you're still on the "official" detour anymore! You are on a strange route with virtually no signs to direct you as you move along. So in faith, you just keep cautiously going forward, making some turns and hoping for an occasional sign to reassure you that you're on the right path.
It struck me that grief is like that "DETOUR" sign. Your life's path, as you knew it, has been altered. The new route is completely unfamiliar, and there are very few signs to help you confidently move forward. The detour has made you stop and slowly discover your changed route. You move through many emotions - shock, numbness, anxiety, anger, sadness and sometimes utter despair. But there are also the emotions of hope, encouragement, faith, and love. The signs that appear to reassure you that you're making it through the detour come in many forms. Sometimes, it's the smiling face of a stranger saying, "Thank you." Or it might be the simple satisfaction you get from doing something new and realizing, "I can do this."
Detours can redirect us to a place we hadn't planned on going, and we discover it has some astonishing beauty we would never have found, if not for the rerouting. By the way, I made it to the meeting on time. And I saw the astonishing beauty along the Mississippi River as I drove away afterwards, purposely choosing a route I'd never been on before.