Harmony means a pleasing arrangement of parts. When relationships are working well, the many parts function together in a pleasing way. When it becomes disharmonious, whether leading to an ending or not, grief emotions will exist. Some relationships continue this way endlessly. Some marriages were never harmonious in the first place. Remember the acronym NEAR to work through the grief cycle that occurs when a relationship ends.
N - Numb from the shock of the loss of harmony and the possibility or certainty that the relationship is ending.
E - Emotions that are painful and confusing dominate. Anger, bitterness, and feelings of rejection are normal feelings during relationship disharmony or uncoupling.
A - Acceptance eventually takes place emotionally after time, assisted by personal growth activities and exercises.
R - Reconstruction is the destination when we have assembled our positive discoveries through the difficult transition and have incorporated our new changed identity into our life.
Often in our busy daily lives, we fail to recognize the grief component of lost relationships or the absence of harmony. As with grief over the death of a loved one, it is helpful to be aware of the many normal feelings that can occur when relationships end or go through periods of disharmony. Once this recognition occurs, follow the self-care recommended during bereavement, and be cautious in decision-making to avoid impulses that may be distorted due to an overload of emotions.
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